Makeover
by AJ Archer
Summary: Lavender and Parvati attack Hermione... but not the way you think. A silly one-shot with a bit of RonHermione.


She should have known that they were planning something by the way they were giggling. Of course, they were always giggling, but she should have seen it coming anyway. Wasn't she said to be the cleverest witch of her age? 

Hermione Granger was innocently (or so she would tell it later) lying on her bed doing her treasured Arithmancy homework, humming. She would have been out in the common room, but Gryffindor had just beat Slytherin in the earlier game, and she really only had two or three hours of celebration in her. There were only so many times one could talk about the way Harry Potter had dived down almost to the pitch just to see Malfoy smash into it - that Wonky-faint thing - which admittedly had been delightfully funny, or that incredible save by Ron Weasley even with two Bludgers screaming toward his head, or his sister Ginny's scoring three times in a row after new Chaser Martin Wolfe managed to steal the Quaffle from Slytherin's Nelson three times in a row. (Katie Bell, new Captain, had nearly creamed her knickers after the third time.)

'_Gotcha_!'

The numbers and letters went blank.

'_Enervate_,' said a giggling female voice.

Hermione groaned and reached up to touch her head - and couldn't! Her eyes flew open. Slowly her vision cleared. 'What the -'

'Morning!' Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil sang together.

Hermione found herself tied to a chair in the sixth-year girls' dormitory with the two girls looking particularly wicked and immediately began to worry. 'Um… hi, Lav, Parvati… what, er, why am I tied to a chair?'

'Well, you see, we've been thinking lately,' Lavender said.

'No sarcastic comments, please,' Parvati added.

'And we've decided you could be very pretty.'

'It's only that you don't try.'

'As illustrated by the Yule Ball.'

'Now, we know that it's time constraints and effort that keep you from looking your best. You're a busy girl - we understand that.'

'So we're going to help you out, Hermione.'

Hermione was suddenly strongly reminded of the Weasley twins. 'That's really not necessary… I mean, I appreciate the thought, really, but- '

'We might have to _silencio_ her,' Parvati said thoughtfully.

'D'you think so? You had better, then - you got the hang of it so much better than I did.' Lavender went over to her trunk and opened it. 'Are you sure we should do it in here?'

'Where else? Here, give me the scissors.'

'Scissors?!' Hermione went rigid.

'_Silencio_!' Parvati exclaimed with a jab of her wand. 'Relax, Hermione, it won't be so terrible… in fact, I think you might like it…'

Meanwhile....

'You two were brilliant,' Katie Bell gushed happily and hugged Ginny Weasley and Martin Wolfe together as she passed by. Harry Potter smothered a laugh at the look on Martin's face- a mixture of embarrassment, annoyance, and pleasure. Ron Weasley coughed and looked distinctly uncomfortable.

'Say… where's Hermione?' Ginny asked in the lull, studying a pastry as if habitually checking for a Canary Cream. Martin gave her a sideways looking-over and Harry took a sip of butterbeer hastily so Ron couldn't hiss anything about having seen that.

'She never stays long, she says she can't study with all the racket.' Ron scanned the common room. Hermione wasn't curled up in the trio's favorite armchairs by the fire, or taking a bit of table from the impromptu feast, or even telling anyone off for an eyebrow-raising tickling match between a couple of fourth-years. 'I'd go up and see if I could talk her into coming back down, but I can't get up there.'

Ginny and Martin immediately burst into giggles. 'I'll go check on her,' Ginny said with a strangely adult look at Martin. Harry choked on his Butterbeer.

'Oi, Gryffindor! Your attention, if you please!'

The four turned and looked up at the stair entrance to the girls' dormitories along with the rest of the room, where Lavender and Parvati were standing with the air of someone about to announce the Queen herself. And, to Harry's surprise, they weren't giggling.

'We would like to introduce you to someone you all know, but may no longer recognize,' Parvati intoned.

'We've wanted to do this for ever so long, and a lot of hard work was put into it, so we hope you like it,' Lavender added.

'So without further ado…'

'We give you the new and improved…'

'Hermione Granger,' they said together and stepped aside.

To reveal a girl, whom one could only assume was Hermione, with her hands over her face. She didn't appear to be crying, only completely mortified.

'Oh, come on, Hermione!'

'Don't cover up, you're being silly!'

Most of Gryffindor, understandably unimpressed by a 'new and improved' that they didn't even get to see, turned back to whatever they had been doing before the interruption with some infrequent glances at the cowering Hermione just to see if she'd revealed herself yet.

'Oh, Merlin,' Ginny muttered and began moving through the crowd. Harry and Ron looked at each other, trying to figure out if this was a Girl Thing and therefore was not something to be involved in and they would only make matters worse anyway or if they should follow her.

After a moment's whispered discussion, they decided to follow on the off chance that Hermione would want either of them there and to show support.

'What are you two thinking?' Ginny hissed to Lavender and Parvati as she, Harry, and Ron made it to the stairs. 'What did you do?'

'I don't know what the problem is, she looks really nice,' Lavender said, wringing her hands. 'Really she does, Ginny. Come on, take a look. Hermione, come on, it's just Gin and Harry and -'

Ginny clapped a hand over Lavender's mouth. 'Ginny and Harry,' she said pointedly, shaking her head at Ron.

Harry raised an eyebrow. Ron opened his mouth, then closed it again, a look of dawning comprehension on his face.

'It's all right, Hermione, everyone's gone back to what they were doing,' Ginny continued.

Harry took the hint. 'Yeah - Hermione, it's fine, it's only us. It can't be so bad - second year had to have been worse, right?'

A tiny laugh escaped Hermione's hands and she peeked through her fingers at Harry. 'I - I suppose…' She slowly moved her hands aside.

Truthfully, Harry couldn't tell all that much of a difference in her face, only her hair. He remembered the Yule Ball, when her hair had been smooth and twisted up somehow, but this was different than that, too - in the whole length area. It was awfully short.

'Well… what, they cut your hair?' he asked, confused. 'Is that all you're on about?'

Parvati looked offended. 'Harry Potter, you're a rock, you know that?'

But Hermione looked suddenly brighter. 'Really - that's all you can tell?' she said in a small voice. 'I thought…'

'Hermione Jane Granger, what d'you take us for?' Lavender cried. 'Did you think we made you up like a - like a slag or something? It's just a little bit of color - a gloss charm - some really quick things you could do before breakfast!'

'You wouldn't let me have a mirror!' Hermione was nearly crying in relief. 'And I don't appreciate being trotted before the whole House either!'

Harry took a better look at her. Her lips were sort of shiny, he supposed. 'Your hair's unfrizzed,' he offered, hoping to get a better response this time.

'Yeah - see, we figured it'd be loads easier to take care of if it were shorter, right? And after we cut it and washed it, it sort of relaxed all on its own,' Lavender explained after taking a moment to seemingly "dumb it down" for him.

Hermione reached up and felt her hair.

'Yeah, it's sort of curly now rather than fluffy,' Ginny agreed. 'It's nice, Hermione. Isn't it, Ron?'

Horror flitted across Hermione's face as she slowly turned away from Harry and Ginny. Ron had been yanked over out of her direct line of vision by Parvati and Lavender, apparently on Ginny's direction, before Hermione had looked up.

He was also staring, which only made it even because Hermione was staring right back at him.

At the same time, they both turned crimson, something Harry found extremely amusing.

Ginny elbowed her brother hard. 'So don't you think it looks better?'

'Yeah, yeah, it's really - nice, better, right." Ron nodded wildly. 'So, er, crisis averted, right? Think I'll go… I'm out of Butterbeer -anyone thirsty?'

'I'll go get you one!' Lavender and Parvati said together and Harry suddenly found himself being dragged along with them away from his two best friends, Ginny in tow.

'Oi - what - I can walk by myself!' he protested.

'Right, of course you can,' Lavender said, smiling at Parvati, who suddenly smiled back. 'Now, Harry, about _your_ hair…'

* * *

Author's Notes: This was a silly fic that suddenly sat up and demanded my pencil's attention. Damned muses. Yes, that is a bit of Ron/Hermione there. Crap, I hate taking sides. This is a one-shot - I wasn't planning on the Giggle Twins tying Harry to a chair in another chapter. And I think if they did it wouldn't have anything to do with his hair. Ta! 


End file.
